Moving On

Nude Back

“Nude Back” by Michael Escoffery

I was devastated,
but more accurately, devastation was me.
I wasn’t happy,
and almost all of the time,
unhappiness clung very tightly to me.

I didn’t even feel that I was living,
that I was,
because I couldn’t feel,
and when I did, it hurt.

One minute, I thought,
“he left me,
so I’ll leave me too.”
The next, I thought,
“he dislikes me now,
so I’ll like me.
Who the hell needs him;
who?”

I’ll dislike all the things he likes.

He likes water,
so I’ll hate water.
He likes air,
so I’ll hate air.
He likes fire,
so I’ll hate fire.
He hates life,
so I’ll hate life.

The ‘only’ that truly like me,
water,
air,
fire
and life;
are the same things keep us alive.

How do you find peace
when a piece of you is gone?
How do you put yourself together
when you’re left in the cold to burn?

“Does he miss me?
Does he miss at feast,
or has he found a different Miss?
Is there a new Beauty for my Beast?”

You have a list of things you hope
he’ll remember and cherish at least.

It hurts;
it’s like an invisible stab to the chest.
It really hurts.

Moving on
and looking back;
moving back
and shedding tears.
Moving on
and looking back;
looking blank
and shedding fears.

That is how the broken have moved on,
for years and years.

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Come Back

My fear of losing you made me lose you.
I was so afraid that you would leave me,
so much so I didn’t realize that you were here,
and that each time I pulled you closer,
it felt like a sharp push to you.
You were not here because I asked you to,
you wanted to be here.
I couldn’t make you stay,
I couldn’t make you do anything.
The only power that I had
was the power to make you leave,
and that exactly was what you did.

Sleeping Beauty

You, my Knight of Swords, my prince;
me, your princess, asleep.
You sucked death out of me- my lips, your lips;
first, it was the mouth,
then it became the nipps;
you made me a new person,
from my hair to my feet.

My death settled on your tongue,
it poisoned your words,
and with each passing day,
you reminded me that I once was dead,
and that I owe you my life.
Our fairytale was over,
my prince was killing me,
I was dying again.

Ex and Oh

We are going to play Ex and Oh today, me and him.
I’m preparing to have the best lines,
give him reasons to spit “oh”s.
I miss him terribly,
I love him still,
but the feeling isn’t mutual to me.
He seems to have more than
enough “O”les at his disposal.
So today, I place an “X” on my heart,
today, I cross the bullshit.

Death II: Death in Shining Armour

Death didn’t spare my previous knight
on his way to meet me,
so he became death.
He died; 
he was dead inside.
He broke hearts and ripped souls,
but I welcomed him with open arms.
Totally rejecting the idea that
he was completely dead,
I tried to fix his wounds.
He snatched my heart and broke it in six,
and I let myself die the 6th time.

Look, I am very quickly becoming death;
so, find another queen.
My flowers are not yours to wet;
my heart’s not yours to win.


Note:
Your knight was/is not Death, queen;
your real knight will come!

 

Love Addict 2

Love will make you sad,
it’ll turn you bad,
and it’ll drive you mad,
if it’s given to you in dribs and drabs.

Us is Dead

Why do I miss you so much
if you are right beside me?
You are gone from you,
you are gone from me.
Your eyes don’t recognize me anymore,
I can’t see myself in them.
You’re alive,
and I’m alive,
but Us is dead;
Us is not on this bed.