Freedomination

Birdy

“The Heart of a Bird” by Colette Wirz Nauke

In your quest for freedom,
if you must fill your wings with anything,
or decorate your wings,
decorate them with feathers,
not gold.

With gold, other birds will stop by,
and admire your beauty,
and aspire to be like you,
and worship the ground beneath your feet.

The day of the storm will come,
the day of the storm is coming,
and on that day,
with extra feathers,
you will fly very quickly to safety.

The day of the storm will come,
the day of the storm is coming,
and on that day,
with golden, swollen wings,
your worshippers will leave you,
the rain will catch up with you,
and beat you till you can barely breathe.

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Bitter-Sweet

How can a yang be a yin?
How?
How can a thing that ought to heal, hurt?
How can a thing that ought to help you walk,
and better still,
give you wings,
keep you in chains,
and make you weak?
How?
How can a thing that ought to give you life
take your breath?
How can a feeling
be the opposite of itself,
when unrequited?
A thing so sweet and tender,
like a newborn baby,
but strong enough
to put you in a chokehold
when you least expect it?

Love, delicate and dangerous.

The Only Constant Thing

Who says the only constant thing is change?
My belly hurts from trying to hold back my laughter,
because even change isn’t always constant.

Sometimes, when you don’t want Change,
when you are sincerely happy with where you are,
and the things you have,
she looks for you and disrupts your house, anyway,
whether or not she has a new one ready,
but many times, when you seek change,
you don’t always get it.
You yearn for it and look for it
but you don’t always find it.

Change closes her eyes when you need her most
and pretends to be legally blind,
and so, even change isn’t constant or stable.
You can’t hold your breath for her,
put all your eggs in her basket,
or put your trust in her.

The only constant thing
is nothing.

The Plot

I should tell you a thing
that happened many centuries ago,
that only I know of.
The stars were going on again
about how great it would be
to replace the moon with the sun.

“Oh, she’s so dull; she’s no fun.
The sun shines brighter;
she’d be so much better for us.”

They all connived to do the replacement
that ended up being very successful.
No one even knew they existed
with the sun shining so brightly;
they hated every minute of having her around.

The grass is greener when you look from afar.
Flowers tend to be extremely beautiful,
until you pluck them to keep and they die.
The sun draws you to her,
she gives light and love and warmth,
like a beautiful, adult siren,
until you draw really close.

The moon decided to return,
and take her place,
as you can see;
your moon may not decide to.

My Only Regret

a_bird_in_a_cage_by_sebowebo-d5esu3r

The only regret that I have
is having regrets-
regretting things that I had
not even attempted yet,
hating myself for making mistakes,
for not being able to change
the things that I couldn’t,
thinking that things end because
they should never have been,
killing myself for wanting to live.

En dehors de ce regret,
je ne regrette rien.

Crying Helps

You can cry if you need to, sky;
you can cry if you need to.
I saw your lighting,
and I heard your thunder;
I know you are upset.

I will come out to sing for you,
and dance for you,
stretch my hands to you,
until you stop.
You can shed your tears into my palms.

I won’t hide from you;
you can’t always be strong.
I’ll listen to you,
and say nice words to you;
I won’t go till I see your sun.

Let’s Give the Sky a Show

I bet the members of the firmament 
always wonder what we do indoors
after we leave the courtyard each night.
Let me make love to you here tonight
before their very eyes.
Let’s make the moon shine brighter in shock,
and give the stars something different to twinkle about.

Venus in “Deadtrograde”

A plate of pain keeps
the potential heartbreaker away.
Two glasses of my old tears daily
will help me not go astray.
I am strong and I need no one’s attention,
but I want to be desired,
and I want affection,
but I was hurt,
I don’t want a repetition,
but I want love,
and I can feel the tension.

I don’t cry.
I don’t cry anymore because
there’s a pool of my tears
in my heart,
and I like to swim in it,
or go down, down, down,
and drown,
when a potential One
comes too close
to my feelings’ flat.
If anyone is to decide when I drown,
it has to be me, myself and I.
Would you give another potential
pretentious,
manipulative
dingbat
a chance to decide when you die?

Six planets are in retrograde
in my natal chart,
and venus used to be one of them,
but she’s not anymore.
My venus is dead;
a man has stabbed my sickly venus to death.

The Passover

He looked like every other angel of birth,
but he was an angel of death,
He looked like every other angel of berth,
but he was an angel of dearth.
He would make you moan in pleasure
so he could make you groan in pain.
I had been warned by his ex-prey,
and I was prepared to drive him insane.
I sprinkled the blood of his victims
on my door,
and in my eyes,
and in my ears,
and on my lips,
and on his head.
“You can’t kill me like you did them.
You have tried in vain, lame.”
He passed right over me,
and he never called me again.

Life is a Tyranny & Time is the Ruler

We are slaves of Time.
It is not a male or a female;
it is a lot greater than both.
It puts us in tight chains
before we even exist.
It is an invincible master
that cannot be rebelled against.
From the time we are born
till the time we die,
time rules us.

Today, it is too early;
tomorrow, it is too late.
Today, we are too young to do this;
tomorrow, we are too old to do that,
till our breaths are seized from us.

Life makes us do time,
and whether we like it or not,
we do it with our hearts behind our backs,
helpless.